Glinting Sunlight
by softly descending
Summary: Logan left her, and she cried, Lorelai's hearts' no longer sure, Luke has died, life is too short to be unhappy. . . .darkfic, but it has a happy ending! eventually. . . . .ON HIATUS
1. Wakening

_Hola peoples! please read! the next chapter will be out as soon as I'm finished with 'a very snowy christmas's next chapter. whcih won't be long I don't think!_

_Disclaimer: Nah I don't own Gilmore Girls, if I did things would be very very different._

_Repost chap. one

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_Wakening _

_A novel one string muse, nothing more than a written word, a classic, a tale, so engrossingly attractive, one should think the author would never write again. _

Looking down at her computer, laptop, Rory sighed. Dropping her head onto her palms she brooded. She should have worked harder, she should never had left Yale for that one year. It had put her so far behind, writing reviews, when she could have been out in the action. Not that she didn't enjoy her current job, she was reading, one of her favourite pastimes, and mocking, criticizing, or praising the content of the book. There just happened to be no room for improvement, no truechallenge in it.

_Ugh_, she shook her head tussling, her short hair and tangling it in her face. Rory opened her cell phone, and flipping through her address book, she became steadily more and more depressed.

'_Damn the never ending….._' The curse words slide from her mouth, a slick hiss of frustration.

Ever since Luke had died, it was sudden no mind, grisly though, it wasn't a good way to go. She and her mother had not been on very good terms, and lately they hadn't been speaking at all.

Rory wasn't dating anyone; Logan had dumped her for a more ambitious woman, who apparently wasn't as deterred by negative comments as she was. Jess was somewhere, most probably in New York, working on a degree in law. Dean had reconciled with Lindsay and they now were very happy, living with their young children in a townhouse in Star's Hallow.

She was still friends with Paris, after all she was little Andromeda's godmother. Rory had attended Paris' and Doyle's wedding when she had still been in their good graces. Now Rory barely saw the new family twice a year.

The Gilmore Girls had become negative. Lorelai's father had died, Luke had gone also. The family was now devoid of men. After Logan had left, Rory too had become bitter, immersing herself in her work, coldly acknowledging only those who would help her move forward.

Sighing, a perfect note, starting high and slowly declining, she moved the mouse and opened a new document.

* * *

Logan was worried. He paced, quickly, unbalanced across the room. He had thought that he didn't love her, been sure of it actually. But now he wasn't so sure. 

Yes, he had dumped Rory. Logan was convinced that she just wasn't what he was looking for, not right now, not ever. But as the saying goes, you don't know what you have until you don't have it anymore. In his case it wasn't an 'it' it was a she.

He missed her terribly. Sadly, Logan had too much pride to admit his mistake, though he was becoming more disheartened every waking moment.

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Closing her eyes, leaning back, she pressed the play button on her walkman. . . . . . 

_Spinning on that dizzy edge  
I kissed his face and kissed his head  
And dreamed of all the different ways I had  
To make him glow  
Why are you so far away? he said  
Why won't you ever know?  
That I'm in love with you_

She opened her sky blue eyes, stretched her fingers, and began to type. Words seemed to pour from her fingers; the way sheeting rain seemed to race from dark clouds.

_Dismal prospects, I have hatred down pat. I can feel It. I've lost it. It's the to cold water slowly sliding down my throat. I have an inability, the inability to_

Love?

Have I lost it?

Impossible. She still loved her mother, she loved her grandmother.

She still loved _him_.

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_Read and Review Pretty Please with Chocolate Cake on top?_

Song: Just Like Heaven by the Cure but I like Katie Melua's version better,


	2. My Eyes

_Sorry I haven't actually been working on anything lately I just got back from my grandparents house for new years. Update for 'a very snowy christmas' should be a couple of days. I apologise if I tend to accidently switch tenses once and a while. Just letting you know I almost failed the grammer part of english class last smester so please don't come after me, unless you're coming after me with something good, like pie._

_Hope you like!_

_Repost: chap. two_

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_My eyes_

Pulling back her hands, Rory pushed her laptop back, under the shelves that shadowed her dark cherry wood desk. Deftly, she reached with her tapered fingers to the walkman, pocketing it, and slowly moved from her twirly chair.

_Show me how you do that trick  
The one that makes me scream he said  
The one that makes me laugh he said  
And threw his arms around my neck  
Show me how you do it  
And I promise too, I promise that  
I'll run away with you_

Hands on hips, she stood, observing her surroundings. Tongue peeking out between her lips to gently slide and rest on her top lip.

She saw the messiness, the seemingly uncontrolled atmosphere of her dorm room. She was caught, and through her calm and collected exterior dark emotions were raging war against her conscience.

How could she love him? She did still love him. A confirmation of something she's broken up about it, this is the first time we've been truly separated since we've met.

Rory looked downwards, her gaze drifting towards her laptop. The screen still bright with her previously written words, reminding her that she needed to wake up early the next morning.

She sighed_, responsibilities? Must I? _Work, her job, her academic dreams, none of them seemed to matter as much as they used to.

She pulled out the earphones and pulled the walkman from her pocket.

Slowly and gracefully, she folded her legs underneath herself and sat Indian – style on the plush carpeted floor of her small studious room.

_This is where I should be. Below everything, look what I've become. _

She needed to sleep, her eyes burning with over – use. But restless as she was, her mind itching, refusing to comply with the senescent cry for sleep._ (vocabulary word let me know if I misuse any words, or are incorrect in my choice of wording)_

Leaning backwards until she was lying fully on her aching back, Rory turned her cheek towards the ceiling, her eyes blank and painful. The sun is rising and red gold lights seep through her closing eyelids.

Breathing, yes, in and ooooout, innnnnn, ouuuttttt. Chest rising slowly and falling gently as she finally fell, softly descending into a dream.

_I can feel it. Opening my eyes to a sound, pressing my neck farther, closer to the trunk of the blossoming cherry tree. Singing, a smooth melody, silkily, slowly streaming into my ears, tumbling, avoiding the rocks and gaps in my mind. It was creating a waterfall, a cascading river of sound._

_Strangely enough, of the waterfall, there was no end._

_Long tan fingers tap my left shoulder. Carefully, elegantly, I tilt my head, ash curls flowing down my chest, and nod. _

_Holding my hand out he takes it. Intertwining our fingers, and pulls me upward, till our lips meet in a sound kiss. _

_Softly, so very, very softly as we part, I stumble, and he catched me as he has done so many times before. . . . . . . . . _

Rory's eyes opened wide, her mouth opening with a word on her lips: Logan.

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_Review if you for some reason feel the need! Not that I don't like them! _

_To be continued. . . . . ._


	3. Don't Flow?

_I'm sorry I know I know i should be updating 'A very snowy christmas' but I'm in a bit of a rut with that one since the plot bunny and most of my muses have gone to the bahamas where theres no snow and a very sunny beach I would presume. I particularly like snow, so they all left me behind. Bloody goddamn muses and the stupid furry bunny... bunnies, you know, I wish my plot one was like the energizer one, then I could write forever...!_

_Please enjoy!_

_Repost: chap. three_

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Don't Flow?

I ran away from home, a long time ago, and I am never going to go back.

Logan sat on the edge of his bed, he was tired, but he felt a recently familiar string of restlessness. His hands were twitching with false energy and his mind wouldn't stop racing.

He rested his hands on his forehead, to try and calm himself

Work was boring, there was nothing new, the simple grey atmosphere of a suburban office outside of New York had no appeal to him, and yet he almost always found himself in that office more than six days out of an ever longer week.

Everything had fallen apart. His father had died and his mother had taken the money and gone to Hawaii to live in her own so called paradise. So until he came of age, twenty five the age of most trust fund receivers, he would be living off of what he earned.

Is there anything left for him? Finn and Colin, who in hell knew where they where? Not in hell though, he would have heard if one of them had died. They all had graduated more than two years ago, and he no longer attended The Life and Death Brigade's reunions, because he would only be going alone.

His shell of a body was betraying him. His mind leading him into waters better left untouched. He hadn't slept for a few days now, for whenever his eyes closed she appeared.

_She_, _Her, Rory_, what ever Logan called her, she would always answer to his fond 'Ace'. Every time he fucked up, she would forgive him, help him, or be there along with him. But that last time, oh, he hadn't fucked up.

He'd fucked someone else.

And he couldn't regret it more.

Looking upwards at the black square clock on the wall, seven thirty, Logan sighed. He stood and shook his head, as if trying to secure his mind inside his skull, but only succeeded in rattling it more. _Aero planes overhead, do you think that tomorrow there will be rain in the capital? Or is there just a chance of the creeping cold reaching my heart?_

It was ruining them, this breakup, tearing apart so many worlds. Spoken words '_I love you,_' a betrayal so hurtful revenge seemed silly, and hatred and longing ruled their small worlds.

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Clutching her small hand to her chest Rory closed her eyes, letting tears slip casually from beneath her eyelids, and feeling the thin jaggedpath they drew as they softly descended down her pale face. 

She felt the loss, the total utter and complete loss. She had no control, Rory couldn't prevent it, and she just couldn't make herself move forward.

_Stop it, make it stop, the pain_, she rocked back hands still nestled at her below her breasts. She hated him,_ loathed_ him, wanted in some way to have his existence ended.

A sound, no wait, a sweet lullaby of a song seemed to be seeping form under the pile of yellow graph paper on her desk.

_Two drifters, off to see the world, there's such a lot of world to see, we're after the same, rainbows end, waiting 'round the bend, my huckleberry friend, moon river, and me._

Rory placed an out stretched hand on the desk top, and slowly sifted through the mess of papers.

Picking up the cell phone, she answered.

'Hello?'

'Rory?'

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_Okay next part should be comingo out soon, sometime, I guess... If you have any suggestions for ' a very snow christmas' then give 'em to me. pretty please with yummyness on top!_

_Disclaimer : no one ever said I couldn't put this at the end! I don't own it but I'll ask daddy to buy it for me formy birthday!_

_I wish..._

_Song is 'Moon river' from 'breakfast at tiffany's' originally sung by audrey hepburn and written by henry mancini._


	4. Going Somewhere

_So here's the next chapter, I warn you, it's really short, but I hope you like it, I'm trying to update all my fics before I go to California._

_Disclaimer: Me? Own? Nah!. . . . I wish. . . . . . . . _

_Happy reading!

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Going Somewhere?

It's not right. The words which come from my broken fingers don't match. The ink on the sullied paper smudges like the mascara mixing with her tears. There's a little good in everything. A little ray of light. I believed her, I loved her. No, I loved believing her charm in her true innocence. There's a little hole in my heart. There's a small secret in my mind. One an unadulterated emptiness, another, a silk bubble of soapy consequence. It was pure ice, causing goose -flesh to tickle the skin on his shoulders.

You have to care.

He wished he had.

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An intricate doily made of fine twine and pink cotton. Exorcise her scent, pull the demons from her silly mind.

Nothing's wrong with her.

_First of all must fly,  
My dreams of you and I,  
There's no point of holding on to those  
And then our ties will break,  
For your and my own sake,  
Just remember,  
This is what you chose_

'Mom?' She bit her lip. Stifling a moan and rubbing her stomach, she willed the nausea away.

'Uh huh,' He mother answered distractedly.

'Mom, is something wrong?' Rory was starting to get worried, they hadn't talked since the funeral, and while that seemed like years had passed, in truth it had been barely a month, five weeks.

'No. I'm not sure if it's wrong.' Lorelai said quietly.

Shaking her head, fighting off the ever escalating dizziness, she asked again, 'Are you sick?'

Her Mom must be pretty ill if she needed Rory to come take care of her. _Oh no_, Rory thought hurriedly, _Last time Mom was sick, Luke had been there, caring for her, nursing her, 'in his gruff but sexy way', as she so thoroughly described it. Once upon a time. . . . ooh I don't feel so well. . . . . _

'Kind of, I guess,' there was an awkward silence 'I'm definitely pregnant though.'

Rory's eyes widened to comical lengths, and she promptly dropped the cell phone as she fainted.

Miraculously, the phone survived the fall and still buzzed with the sound Lorelai's unknowing voice.

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Okay, this was it. He couldn't take it anymore. He was going to go see her, and be damned if he didn't feel badly for what he had done.

Logan stood slowly, feeling weighted by the sorry state of his decision making capacity. Oh, no time for thinking, there's something so much more important it seems.

As he left his apartment, he attempted to clear his mind from the poisonous string of thoughts eating into his confidence.

Armed with insecurities and a full heart of guilt, Logan smiled hopefully and climbed into his car.

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_Ah,_ _now I'm going to update my other, seemingly more popular fic, Randomoscity! If haven't read it, please do! It's pretty funny I like to think!_

_Sons is still just like heaven by Katie Melua. Please review I like to know that you read it! Ahhh, me feel too happy! _

_Toodles like_ _poodles!_


	5. AN:

AN: Hi Everyone! I have some bad news. Due to an extreme family emergency, I will have to put my stories on hiatus, as I won't be able to update for some time. I won't have computer or internet access where I will be going. Thank you for your support. Hopefully, I won't be gone for too long. Thanks again!


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